Tuesday, April 30, 2013
Obuaism Chronicles Chapter 35.5
AD 2000: Passing Labor City
Passing Labor City, a bustling city from trade of firearms and machines. People live luxurious lifestyles here thanks to the wonderful leaders governing this wonderful place.
King Kymsyang (Not a korean apparently) rules over Passing Labor with absolute authority with his right hand man, Ong "Gambler God" In-chek. These two leaders brought prosperity over Passing Labor since they took over the helm.
However, every place has a black sheep...or in this case, a black donkey.
==The Legend of Donkey Sek==
Passing Labor City: Six "R" Two Tavern
Drunk Guy: Bring me more booze!!!!!!! MORE BOOZE!
Tavern Master: Right away Sire!
It was an ordinary busy day in Six "R" Two Tavern
Gossiping Drunkard A: Heard about the new guy in the government?
Gossiping Drunkard B: Yeah think his name is Sek or something...
Gossiping Drunkard C: His nickname is donkey i heard....he looks and sounds like one
Sek: He hor....really looks like donkey meh?Gossiping Drunkard C: Haha nice impersonation...heee horrrr heee horrr!!!Sek: huh? I not impersonating he hor!Gossiping Drunkard C: Hahaha there you go again he hor!!!!! heeee horrr!!!
Gossiping Drunkard B: Yeah think his name is Sek or something...
Gossiping Drunkard C: His nickname is donkey i heard....he looks and sounds like one
Sek: He hor....really looks like donkey meh?Gossiping Drunkard C: Haha nice impersonation...heee horrrr heee horrr!!!Sek: huh? I not impersonating he hor!Gossiping Drunkard C: Hahaha there you go again he hor!!!!! heeee horrr!!!
5 mins later.....
Tavern Master: Get some guys over here! Three dead men found!
Tavern Master: Get some guys over here! Three dead men found!
With a navy blue beret on his head, uniform ever so neat, Sek walks out of the Tavern with pride and glory. Nobody badmouths the Donkey...nobody...
Obua: ehhhhh my dear pupil Jan....ehhh i bring you to nice place today. My old friend Kymsyang asked me to visit him.
Jan: Master Obua, why never bring Zee along? We brother brother later he jealous!
Obua: If I bring him along....chapter 35 will be wierd....since he would have met Donkey
Jan: Chapter 35??? What talking you? Who is Donkey?
Obua: I don't know either....ask the writer lah. Come we got nice restaurant eat lunch first
Jan: Master Obua, why never bring Zee along? We brother brother later he jealous!
Obua: If I bring him along....chapter 35 will be wierd....since he would have met Donkey
Jan: Chapter 35??? What talking you? Who is Donkey?
Obua: I don't know either....ask the writer lah. Come we got nice restaurant eat lunch first
Passing Labor City: DeeSeeCee Chinese Diner
Jan: Master, why this place name so funny called DeeSeeSee?
Dee: Because
See: We are
Cee: Brothers
Dee: Because
See: We are
Cee: Brothers
In front of them stood triplets who are the bosses of this diner
Jan: Oh they brother brother lah hahahaha
Jan: Oh they brother brother lah hahahaha
Obua: Lets order food, I want this Matador Launcher Set
Jan: Then I shall have this ThunderFlash superb feast!
Jan: Then I shall have this ThunderFlash superb feast!
Meanwhile some diners were gossiping
Gossiping Hungry Man A: Hey did you hear about the Six "R" Two Tavern incident?Gossiping Hungry Man B: Yeah! 3 men found deadGossiping Hungry Man C: I reckoned its the "Donkey" Sek
Gossiping Hungry Man A: Hey did you hear about the Six "R" Two Tavern incident?Gossiping Hungry Man B: Yeah! 3 men found deadGossiping Hungry Man C: I reckoned its the "Donkey" Sek
Gossiping Hungry Man A: Why is he called Donkey again??Sek: You all hooorrr....why talkin about donkey again? He hor....so famous meh?
Gossiping Hungry Man B: More like infamous but anyway I think I was the only eye witness who saw him running away from the crime scene.
Sek: You really saw him hor???Gossiping Hungry Man B: Yeah with my own two eyes...
Sek: You really saw him hor???Gossiping Hungry Man B: Yeah with my own two eyes...
A loud explosion occured in DeeSeeSee moments later....
Obua: Ehhhhhh WTF!??? My matador launcher set!!!!!!
Jan: My ThunderFlash superb feast!!!!
Both: WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS!!!!
Jan: My ThunderFlash superb feast!!!!
Both: WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS!!!!
Sek: He hor...( pointing to Gossiping Hungry Man B) saw me running away from crime scene...so he hor....must die.....and so will the two of you.....hehehe horhorhor...
How will this battle turn out? To be continued along with the original main story...
Monday, April 29, 2013
Obuaism chronicles –
chapter 35 ~ Land of chaos
Last chapter, Jan was
captured by pirates and held captive by the notorious pirate, the great Gangplank.
Also, he met a pirate with the name of cannon Jun. Due to the fact that Jan did
not want to serve under another flag, he was “sentenced” to execution by
gangplank
Cannon Jun: Cap’n, ya
don’t have to be so cruel would you? He didn’t even do anything to you, why
must you kill him?
Gangplank: Honestly, I
have no idea, but I just felt that it’s cooler for me to kill my captives than
release them. Set a better example for my men ah…
Cannon Jun: I see…
As Gangplank turns his
back to Cannon Jun, Jun drew out his pistol, pointing it to Gangplank.
Cannon Jun: Too bad…
They’re not your men anymore.
With that, he fired a
bullet straight to the head of gangplank and killed him instantly.
Jan: Wha…? How the
hell are you so accurate?
Cannon Jun: Lim bei
seven years old start to fire my gun below, eight years old start assembling
guns, nine years old get my marksman badge for every single kind of gun.
Jan: …. Why did you
kill him anyways?
Cannon Jun: this
dictator on the ship has ill treated me and the others for long enough, this
was a mutiny.
Jan: So… you’re the
new captain now?
Cannon Jun: Yes.
Jan: So….. can I go
now?
Cannon Jun: No.
Jan: … say real one,
you play me ah? Why not!?
Cannon Jun: This ship
just broke down, we’re stuck here for now, unless you wanna jump ship that is…
Jan: …
Meanwhile, in some Mountain…
Zee: I wonder where
the others disappeared to…
Waiman: Yeah…
Zee: The sky is
getting dark… We need to find shelter… Last few nights had been terrible with
all those never been seen before monsters attacking us…
Waiman: Yeah, from
some wolfman to a dragon to a scarecrow with tons of crows to a troll to a
golem… what’s with this place…
Zee: Still dare to say, I was the one killing them
while you’re doping on your stupid wee-…. Is that a town?
In front of Zee, a
gigantic city was in sight
2 hours later…
Zee: This city seems
cool… just that we have no cash to stay in a hotel…
Waiman: Hey, look at
this…
Waiman points to a
poster
Zee: tag team
tournament… Prize money, $9000+++… interesting…
Waiman: Wanna join?
Zee: …. Wouldn’t it be
like 1v2 for our case since you’ll just be smoking your weed?
Waiman: Oi, I don’t
only know how to smoke weed hor, its cause you all too op must give handicap to
the opponents ma…
Zee: Fine fine, lets
enter.
And thus, zee and
waiman joined the tournament, and fought with various warriors from this unknown
land, and reached the finals.
Finals
Zee: huff… huff…. Walan
eh, smoke smoke smoke, I 1v2 all the way leh, tiring one leh….
Waiman: Aiya, I conserving
my ability til the last battle ma…
???: My name is Dyrus,
you’ll regret opposing me.
???: Welcome to the
league of dreyvan!
Announcer: And now,
for our final bout, the Obuaian Duo, versus the blood brothers!
Zee: So…. On e guy
with a huge ass axe and another with two throwing axes… probably brothers…
Waiman: This bout…. You
shall rest my friend, I’ll take care of them.
Zee: Sure not…?
Waiman: of cour-
Dreyvan: Whirling
destruction!
Dyrus Sudden Death
Ksing strike!
Before waiman could
finish his sentence, dreyvan threw two axes and dyrus jumps towards the obuaian
duo.
Waiman: Sigh…. At least
let me finish my sentence la…
Waiman conjures out a shotgun
and fires a massive shot which instantly vaporized dyrus and dreyvan’s axes,
leaving them with no weapon.
Dyrus: Wha…. Wadafaq happened?
Waiman: Usually you’ll
be vaporized as well, but seeing how this is just a tourney, I changed the bullet
to one that doesn’t affect any living organisms.
Dreyvan: … We surrend-…
Ugh…..
Dyrus: Broth-… ugh….
Zee: What the hell’s
happening?
???: Welcome to the
great city of Pasba, the divine country of the west. Congratulations on winning
the tournament.
Waiman: Ehh….. Thanks,
but…. Why did you kill them?
???: Oh… They…. Shouldn’t
be here in the first place. Well…. Sort of
like copy right issues.
Zee: ok…. So…. Who in
the hell are you?
???: The name is Sek,
or you can call me Donkey, royal advisor of this humble town.
Waiman: *lights a
joint* Ok… so wassup….
Sek: We are in need of
strong warriors, thus this tourney was hosted. Would you serve under our flag?
Zee: There’s only one
lord we’ll serve, and I hope you’ll respect our decision. We just joined due to
the prize money.
Sek: If you do not
join, you won’t be getting a cent.
Zee: Why not? We won,
didn’t we?
Sek: Look at this…
Sek holds up the
poster
Sek: I quote… “Tag
team tournament, prize money $9000+++.”
Zee: ya ah, correct ma…
Sek: that is where you’re
wrong!
Sek takes out a
gigantic magnifying glass, holds it in front of the poster
Sek: I quote again, “*Terms
and conditions apply*”, and the terms are “Only applicable for the winners when
they sign on to join the Pasba royal forces for a minimum bond of 4 years.”
Zee: wakao, eh not
fair leh, you write until so small, who can see sia…
Sek: So I ask you
again, will you join us?
Waiman: You hear the
man earlier, we have only one lord.
Zee: Wait….. waiman,
how come you seem normal while smoking your joint ah….
Waiman: This land no
weed leh… smoking grass now….
Sek: So since you guys
have no intention to join us, good luck. Guards! There’re two spies here, you
know what to do.
Pasbar royal guard
captain: Spies!
Zee: Shit… We’re
surrounded…
Waiman: What now?
???: Heh, time to make
my flashy entrance.
To be continued